READY OR NOT, HERE COMES A BABY!

Before all this chaos unraveled, we were in the middle of selling our house and attempting to buy a house in a quiet neighborhood with a big backyard. We were able to swing both transactions and we moved in at the beginning of April 2006. While this was going on, we were also on call for the arrival of a baby girl who was due in April. We were getting quite stressed with moving, trying to prepare the house for a baby, and also preparing ourselves for a baby. But, the excitement far outweighed the stress.

When it came to deciding her name, we had no problem agreeing on the first name, Julia. It’s a unique name, but not a weird, made up name. We wanted to be different without being pretentious. But, the middle name has a deep meaning to both the birth family and us. Jo is in honor of my brother Joe. Lee is in honor of the birth family. They have a tradition in their family that some form of Lee was in either a first or middle name. This was a way to include them in Julia’s life from a distance. The name means a great deal to both families and allows a certain part of each family to live on through her name.

Early in the morning, on April 27, 2006, we received a call from the birth mother. She had given birth to a healthy baby girl. The adrenaline shot through our bodies and we went into “crazy mode.” Even though we were prepared for the moment, it’s weird how all that preparation sinks to the back of your mind and that rush of adrenaline overwhelms you. Nevertheless, we packed up the car and took off for Cedar Rapids.

Upon arriving there, we were informed by the maternal birth family that the birth father had been trying to get in to see the baby. But, the hospital staff turned him away. The only way he was going to be able to see her is if the baby was in the nursery. So, we decided as an extended family unit, to always have her in our room or the birth mother’s room. He had abandoned them in their time of greatest need, and was now looking to cause trouble. This was causing a lot of stress and anxiety on the birth family and ourselves. We were not anticipating this battle with the birth father. Little did we know, that this was only the beginning.

After talking to the maternal birth grandparents, we were able to go into the birth mother’s room and meet our daughter. As I write this entry, it seems like a very weird arrangement, but in reality, there was nothing weird about it. This was how God orchestrated this to happen, and we were all confident in His plan. There was obviously a great joy in meeting our daughter for the first time, but there also was a divine connection from Joe’s death to Julia’s birth. To Kristin and I, this was a sign of a sovereign God showing his compassion toward us.

Kristin and I had our own hospital room down the hallway from the birth mother. The arrangement was for us to stay in the hospital and take care of Julia from the beginning. She stayed in our room during the night, the hospital staff administered tests on her in our room…we were her parents! The birth mother took Julia for periods of time to have her time with Julia before we left the hospital and started the new chapter in all our lives. The maturity and generosity of this young woman was quite remarkable given the situation. She never wavered from her intelligent decision to give Julia the life she deserved.